Shock Value
I've never found the messages in fortune cookies to be very compelling nor particularly prophetic for that matter. More often than not they convey nebulous predictions and archaic maxims devoid of any real meaning. I'm of the belief that such messages would be far more entertaining if they were presented with a bit more imagination.
"You're going to be hungry again in an hour"
"Congratulations, cigarettes won"t kill you! You're cancer will be pancreatic"
"A bird in the hand can't crap on your shoulder"
"Your mother loves your sister best"
"You will receive very good news today...Not really"
"Eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow is the Rapture"
"You're ugly"
"You can lead a man to water but he asked for beer you idiot"
"Take your time eating, there's no sense in walking into a home invasion is there?"
"You really didn't need that fourth trip to the buffet table, sparky"
"You're going to be hungry again in an hour"
"Congratulations, cigarettes won"t kill you! You're cancer will be pancreatic"
"A bird in the hand can't crap on your shoulder"
"Your mother loves your sister best"
"You will receive very good news today...Not really"
"Eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow is the Rapture"
"You're ugly"
"You can lead a man to water but he asked for beer you idiot"
"Take your time eating, there's no sense in walking into a home invasion is there?"
"You really didn't need that fourth trip to the buffet table, sparky"
posted by M.R. at 2:54 PM
5 Comments:
I always hated those fortunes in those darned things. Never made any sense to me. Why do I feel as if I HAVE to look at it?
"Sparky"! Ha! Love it!
Peace................
Just passing through, cool blog by the way.
.. and for the record, panreatic cancer is smoking related, so that cookie may be a stale one too... Skin cancer however: now that's a crispy one...
Gripes - Thanks for the medical knowledge.
I didn't know pancreatic cancer was smoking-related, either. Does the smoke billow around your insides like it does in cartoons?
My favorite: "You are an idiot who seeks advice from baked goods."
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